SHAKIRA

well, I said I wasn't going to write, but whoops I lied. I have to:

I had a dream that I was karaoke-ing Shakira's "Hips Don't Lie" at a bar in Colombia. The crowd loved me, obviously, granted only for my voice because Shakira moves in ways that I would not embarrass myself trying to imitate. Anyways, my performance was so well loved it began to receive national notoriety and what do you know, soon the tales made it all the way to Shakira herself. Shakira did not believe that this gringa could actually sing, so she needed to see for herself. After hearing me she fell in love with me and the fact that I stood an entire foot taller than her. Shakira and I went on to record many duets together.

This can only mean good things are coming in Colombia.